Deeeeeeeep breath.

It's been a rough morning around here. Team Mongoose struggles with Sundays. Lots of transitions happen on Sundays. Someone is either coming or going and that increases anxiety. When I look at it with my therapist brain, it makes total sense. Transition is hard, even when you are prepared for it. Transitioning between what might seem like two completely different cultures, even harder.

I am starting to feel anxiety about Sundays, which is a shame. It's one of my goals, when I have a life back that no longer includes mandatory readings and paper writing, to really start working on this. We have to find a new way to manage this in our home. Perhaps a celebration aspect could be added? I am not sure. Anyone out there have ideas? I would be in very deep appreciation for any wisdom you could offer.

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There are so many reasons why I should hate this photo, but I don't.

I participated in a photo shoot for an event called the #suitupcampaign. It is the hope of the woman organizing it to have a more varied representation of body types in swim suits, which would in turn invite other women to feel comfortable "suiting up" for summer if they saw bodies that looked like theirs. I was asked to submit a picture of my suit and so I set out to take a couple selfies. As I was going through them and I started to notice something; I looked beautiful. As a fat, white, cisgender, femme-presenting, often mis-identified queer woman who is currently partnered with a cisgender man, I have received many messages about my body over the course of my life. From a very young age my body was labeled as fat. I understood the resounding message that my worth was directly tied to in how much space I was supposed to take up in the world. I understood that it was always open season on my body - from family, friends, doctors and even stranger...

The look that started it all...

When I began my new attempt at fashion/photo taking journey it sprung from this cute picture. I was reading a bunch of articles by Lesley Kinzel and she kept showing up in these cute little dresses with leggings and a shirt tied high. I loved the look and again, was convinced that it would not work on my body type. This is an ongoing narrative in so many peoples lives. "I can't wear this, it's not right for my body." "I can't cut my hair that short, my face is too fat." "I can't show my arms because they jiggle." All these are excuses that get in the way of living a full life, a life that we deserve. I can't how many times I have allowed myself to miss out on an adventure, both big and small, out of fear of how my body may be perceived or fear that it/I won't be accepted. I am tired of feeling that way. I am tired of feeling like I don't deserve to feel good in what I am wearing, how I want to move my body and wh...

Little Bliss List!

I believe I mentioned before falling in love with this website . I stumbled upon Liv (pronounced leeev, not like "Live Strong") when looking for ideas for Christmas. She creates some really positive and affirming art and has a store on Etsy. Anyway, on her blog, she has created a weekly post dedicated to recognizing the moments of bliss in her life. She invites others to post their own list and link with her. I wanted to do this last week, and didn't get it together in time. This week I figured what better way to wrap up my weekend than spend a few minutes recognizing my moments of bliss over the course of the last week. So here I go... 1) The smell of fresh brewed coffee on Monday morning and caramel mocchiato creamer. 2) Spending time with my bestie supporting each other through rough work stuff and celebrating the planning of her impending nuptials. I love that our relationship is deep, strong and marvelously complicated. 3) Weekly chats with my Grams. I am...

It's mine so hush...

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